I need to get away. I have to see about that. I need to and I have to; are not friends. I need to, wants to dot the eyes and cross the tees. I have to makes sure that when all is said and done; all is said and done. I need to take a walk after dinner. I have to make dinner tonight. I need to proofread this work before it gets sent upstairs for every one to see. I have to take some time this weekend to sit down and write something about his life so that I do not look like a fool giving the eulogy. I need to make some new friends. I have to treat my old ones better. I need one more chance to make it all right. I have been feeling guilty that I let things get as bad as they have become. I need to sit and spend more time reading. I have been lazy since the surgery and have trouble concentrating. I need to exercise. I have put on some weight just sitting on my arse eating what ever I felt like eating. I need to take control. I have no chance of ever taking control. I need chaos. I fantasied that one-day all will be settled and the ground beneath me will quit shaking. I need to take better care of myself and my id and my ego and my alter ego. I have always wanted to be a super hero. I need to stand up straight. I have been looking at pictures of a place in China that is literally just one big hole in the ground. I need to get my head out of the clouds. I have; I need. I have what I have always needed.Needs