The New Year’s Day meeting of neighborhood yard inflatables and nativity characters got off to a slow start. The Jacob’s Santa barely had enough air in him to call the meeting to order because their son had smeared peanut butter embedded with birdseed on the aging Santa Christmas Eve and birds had done more damage than duct tape could repair. Luckily Frosty the Snowman was able to take over as Santa slowly hissed away in his sleigh. First order of business was the big blowup, which had lead to some seriously poor Christian like behavior among the neighbors regarding animal droppings from a live Nativity scene. The ensuing arguments resulted in one neighbor adding to his display two Penthouse inflatables. A miss Betty Boobalicious and miss Sally Seaside Slut, that he positioned between Rudolf and Vixen on his roof display portraying the girls giving the deer the ride of their lives. Eventfully he placed the mademoiselles in the doorway of his RV parked beside his house with a sign telling passerby, “ Yawl come back,” directly underneath a large sprig of inflatable mistletoe. Christmas Eve his neighbor saw the display and called the police resulting in flashing lights filling the street for hours. Fred Ripley awoke Christmas morning to discover that a strong wind had unmoored his Ninja Turtle display and that one rolling Ninja had slain three quarters of his yard display with the authentic Japanese sword he had tied to it for realism! His yard looked like a massacre scene of deflated plastic and knotted cords. The biggest mess however was at the Steinke’s. Bill Steinke, freshly divorced, came back to find his wife’s new husband had trashed all his inflatables and gone with a spotlight on a door wreath! Oh the horror of it all!